Feels kinda like the Detonator, except opposite.

I encourage no one to take offense to this post, only a few would. I apologize for times i sound prideful, but i am venting and telling the truth as i see it (hehe).

Today was the day, the day when parts for the drama (this year The Merchant of Venice) were posted. The day that comes twice a year and has now left me disappointed 10 times (once in 5th and 6th grade, and twice in 9-12). Before today i had run the scenario through my head many times, i didn't see much of a worst case scenario possible, that is until i read the posted sheet. It's never good when you start at the top and have to scroll for a while before you find your name and then your first response is "Who?" Now that's not to say that i have gotten to play some really fun parts (Soulis, ALI HAKIM!!, and even seemingly boring Baptista was good times thanks to the amazing cast (doug, matt)). But i have also put up with some serious crap like Townsperson #2 in Seven Brides (yeah that means 14 good guys parts), and the Firetruck in Velveteen Rabbit (as a 6th grader!! The oldest kids in the show). i have paid my freaking dues ok? No one at our school has done more productions than me. So to see someone who never even entered my mind snatch one of the leading roles i was confident would go to one of my best friends (and hence giving my friend the part i expected and booting me out of the trio. and don't even say he is more qualified than i or either of my friends. But this is nothing against him. He didn't give himself the part.) left my stomache sinking into Marianasian depths. Thoughts of hoping the play would bomb crossed my mind. Actually they never crossed. They have plopped themselves comfortably in my head...quitting occurred to me, but i would never sink to the depths of those people, you know who you are. i still fully intend to make the directors regret their decision, either (and most likely) through my performance, or, well, something else happening (ask me...if you think you want to know). i guess the reason i am so upset is that this year there is no "next time" and i didn't just get the seniority card played on me. i got the "you suck" card played on me. It's like going out with aces against AK...you did everything right, just someone upstairs decided to screw you over and let the worse player win. But bring it on folks. In a week or two, i will have embraced Lorenzo as myself and let go of my shredded hopes, but they'll still be sitting there on the floor, inspiring me to pull out all the stops.

In other news, i got the Keane CD today titled "Hopes and Fears." I highly recommend listening to some of their stuff if you like coldplay. This was my first really fueled rant. It felt kinda good, but i probably shouldn't dwell on it. Keep the ole attitude positive :). Later kids.