signs our world is dying

i have recently felt convicted for having a Potter-centric blog title and not mentioning the septology once in my posts. So here it is, my first potter rant.

Today i heard that a certain brother of a close friend of mine began reading the potter books recently. "That's great," i thought. Then i heard he started with Goblet of Fire (book 4 for those of you who arent my friends). He had already seen the first 3 movies, so it was ok.

OK?! Ok to skip the first three parts of the greatest fiction of my generation? ok to miss out on the experience of imagining the second most complete fictional world ever (LOTR)? ok to miss Rowling's keen wit (almost completely lost in the films)? After watching two Columbus-headed live action Disney movies, and the artistic, focused Cuaron film (not just a movie, and shane, if you read this, you are wrong, and i don't want to talk about it with you), this guy thinks he has enough potter knowledge to experience GOF! What really ticks me off about this is that if there were four movies out, he would have started with book five, finished it, and thought himself as informed as we potterheads. No sirree! My prayer for this soul is that when he finishes his shallow reading of the last two books, he will recognize his arrogance, repent, and read all 5 books through again before HBP comes out. Then and only then will i forgive, and even after i forgive, it will be something he has to live with for the rest of his life. Like a murderer. Sure God can forgive him, but the man can never forget the life he took. It will scar him for life, like Umbridge's quill on the back of Harry's hand (If you have ideas for how we can punish this lost soul, let me know in the comments).

Traffic froze, his fingers kept searching the presets, only to find mouthy DJs and local commercials. He flipped on the vent. Carbon monoxide and whatever else smaug contains hit him in the face (it must contain something else, after all, CO is odorless). Reaching into the glove compartment, (does anyone put gloves in there? did anyone, ever? Wouldn't they get frigid?) efficient causality popped into the brain. Now you may ask, why efficient causality ever pops into anyone's brain, and to that, i have no desire to reply right now. For our suffocating man though, it was a natural thought process that brought him there. He wanted to know why he was having a crappy ride home. Answer: traffic jam. Well how do traffic jams start (if there isnt a wreck or unnecessary construction)? Usually it is all the fault of one person driving scared. "O my gosh, this person is trying to merge, and i am going 70, and he is going 30, but i really need to let him in even though i could just pass him and he would be fine, but o my i gotta hit the BRAKES!!! Grandma slams her foot down, Chucko get in the lane, but not until the 100 cars behind about died and everyone stopped. So there is the Prime mover.

Now what i want to do sometime is get in a huge traffic jam, set up a monstrous radio communication web like they used for the traffic in the Matrix Reloaded highway scenes, and get everyone to hit the gas at the same time. That would be a rockin way to spend a weekend, and Oioloa! No more traffic jam.